You might have noticed I’ve been running a few free workshops in the evening talking about discovering what makes you happy.

And I wanted to share with you one of the tools I’ve been sharing to help you start to define what will make you happy, and to help you to create your own North Star, so you can start to ask yourself ‘is this life I’m living really fulfilling me?’.

The tool is not created by me, but by a Canadian Author Danielle La Porte in her book The Desire Map, well worth a look at if this post peaks your interest!

In the Desire Map Danielle asks us to consider how we want to feel?

Now before this point a few years ago, I’d never even considered how I wanted to feel, or thought that I was totally in control with how I wanted to feel – this felt groundbreaking!

I could map out how I wanted to feel and then look at my life and start to change my life so it was more aligned with how I wanted to feel.

So, what do we mean ‘how do you want to feel’?

So I want you to spend some time pondering these questions:

How do you want to feel?

How do you deserve to feel?

What would make you feel stronger and more able to create the life you want to live?

Take a look at the following words and ask yourself, which ones pop out at you, what do you feel naturally drawn to?

Courage. Radiant. Alive. Exuberance. Love. Connected. Valued. Beautiful. Loved. Appreciated. Energized. Joyful. Whole. Peaceful. Abundant. Empowered. Safe. Adored. Beautiful. Generous. Effervescent. Free. Vibrant. Sovereign. Whole-hearted. Reborn. Sun-Lit. Intense. Bright. Emphatic. Elation. Significant. Important. Rewarded. Fertile. Co- Creative. Impactful. Transparent. Inspirational. In-Tune. Present. Resonant. Studious. Innovative. Cultured. Daring. Lucky. Supercharged. Dependable. Adequate. Energized. High-Flying. Playful. Unfiltered. Talented. Worthy. Liberated. Unleashed. Wide-Eyed. Dynamic. Irresistible. Tranquil.

And when I see this list of words I want to roll around in them – they feel so powerful, so vibrant and just reading them makes me feel alive!

For me I like to pick one word at a time to work with.

The first word I choose was ‘calm’. I wanted more calm in my life. I was rushing from one event to another, I was snappy at my daughter, I wasn’t sleeping well, I was trying to fit too many things into one day and I wanted to feel calmer.

I wanted to stop rushing around, I wanted to stop driving like a maniac, I wanted to sleep better and I wanted more patience around my daughter.

And bringing focus on this word calm enabled me to start seeing my life through this lens. At the end of each day I would ask myself how calm I’d been. With my daughter I used the word calm like a mantra, and it helped me pause before reacting. I started saying no to things, and choosing my work more carefully and really considering how much I could fit into one day.

What word would you choose to help you create some clarity on how you want to feel, how you want to life your life and to really consider what’s important to you?