There are so many things that you can distract you! Looking at what other people are doing and asking yourself ‘should I be doing it like that?’ Opportunities that come your way. Things that you might have even wished for. Social media. Emails. Your life!
So many distractions and only so many days in the week.
This post is about the bigger picture things, the 'where are you going with your life' and the things that distract you from that.
If you’re looking for advice on the day to day distractions you could read:
So how, can you manage those big distractions, and focus on what it is you really want to be doing?
And why, when we know where we want to be, do we let ourselves be distracted? Because we are in charge. 100%. So, if we’re being distracted, it’s because we’re letting it happen.
Here are 3 reasons you might be getting distracted from what you really want to be doing:
You’re not actually sure where you are going
If you don’t really know the direction you want your business to go in, it can be easy to be distracted and let ‘other’ things creep in.
And while you might be happy not knowing where you are going (there’s a whole host of people who advocate getting lost in cities, because that’s where the real magic happens). You might also feel actually lost, frightened and unsure of what you’re doing and where your business is going. And that will wear you down in the end.
A good place to start, would be to sit down, somewhere away from your desk and ask yourself…’what makes me happy’, ‘if I could do anything, what would it be?’, if you’re at a party and you’re talking to people about your business, which bit of it could you talk about endlessly?
Discovering what we want to do when we grow up is an endless question. Some people seem to just know. Marie Kondo (who wrote the magic of tidyning up) said she’s loved cleaning since about 4. I envied her when I read that. Imagine just always knowing what you’re meant to be doing!
You’re not enjoying where you’re headed
It might be that lots of things are stopping you moving in the direction you think you want to go because you don’t really want to go there?
You’re literally putting concrete blocks on your feet with all these distractions, so you can’t go where you wanted to go, because deep down you don’t want to go there.
This might take a little bit more soul searching. When we’ve invested time and even money creating something that just doesn’t float our boat anymore, it can be terrifying, to admit we don't want it anymore.
The sunk fallacy talks about how when you’ve put some much effort into something and it’s failing, you can’t stop, because you’ve invested so much into it. I think this is also the same when you’re heading in the wrong direction.
You can always change direction. You only have one life. Listen to your intuition.
And here’s the third reason you might be letting distractions get in the way.
You are scared.
You’re scared of failing. You have a dream about the direction you want to move in, but what if it doesn’t work out, and you put loads of effort in and it’s just crap? So better not bother. And ohh, what’s that shiny bright thing over there, I better divert my attention to that.
I’ve had this exact situation recently. I was offered a shiny in the bag opportunity, that I was actually really good at, would have enjoyed and would have paid me quite well.
But here’s the thing. Working on this other project would have diverted my attention away from where I wanted to go.
And also, as my coach said ‘Just because you’re good at something, doesn’t mean you have to do it.’
So sometimes we just have to call it out for what it is.
My mind was racing with, well if I give up this opportunity (that pays well and is a sure thing) and then where I’m headed doesn’t work out so well then…
Your personal fear story plays havoc.
I know you’ll have your own personal fear story. And when you start feeling uncomfortable and not quite sure of yourself, this fear dinosaur will rear up its head.
It’s saying ‘look just stay where you are in the comfortable (though no really that comfortable know place), don’t take risks or want for more than you have. Because if you do it will all come crashing down and I’ll get you and your worst fears will come true.’
What's your fear story? The one that plays out when you’re pushed to make decisions? Are these stories getting in the way of you creating your future the way you want it to be?
My fear story goes like this
‘My business will come crashing down, all my friends and family will leave me, I’ll be lonely, I’ll end up homeless living in a cardboard box, then I’ll get cancer and die.’
Now it seems extreme, but I left home at 17 (hence the homeless bit), spent quite a few years lonely and feeling isolated and I have had cancer. So, my fear story is all the bad bits of my life rolled into one big fear dinosaur that’s going to eat me up for breakfast.
And sometimes it’s so loud I let it get in the way and cloud my judgment.
But then I remember this quote ‘If you’re not a risk taker, you should get the hell out of business’ (Ray Krok who started MacDonalds said this). And I want to take risks and hell you only get one life, so I’m going to keep on my path and learn to say no.
Can you say no?
Are there things that you’re saying yes to now, that means you have less time to do what you really want to go? That divert you away from your true calling? From really trying to see if you can make those dreams a reality?
There are so many opportunities in life that come our way. But we don't have to take them all. Sometimes we are just moving along seeing where life takes up, and that's fine. But if you have somewhere you dream to be, ask yourself if this thing I'm doing, the opportunity I'm being offered, going to move me towards my dream, or just be another distraction.
And as scary as it is, fortune favours the brave.
Want to create a strategy to create your dream business? Come and talk to me!